The Walmart-exclusive Toxitron Collection is a wonderful thing (minus the “Walmart-exclusive” bit). As I said when I reviewed the line’s version of Mirage, the idea behind it is that the entire line-up is made up of repainted figures homaging older, canceled toys. And most of those canceled toys are from Generation 2, the Neon 90’s iteration of Transformers, so they’re a bright, colorful bunch in a way that really appeals to me. Now, as for Sideswipe here, he actually did get a couple of Generation 2 figures back in the day.

This one’s basically his official Player 2 Colors these days.

The first was a repaint of his original G1 toy, in a fetchingly inverted black-and-red colorscheme that gets homaged a lot these days, including a 2019 repaint of his Siege toy that I reviewed over here. Later on, in the line, he received a small-sized Go-Bot figure, in blue.

These colors kinda-sorta match today’s subject, too.

But concept art and a hand-painted test shot exists for another planned repaint of the G1 toy, in a bright yellow and blue scheme, with sunset patterns across its body.

To be fair, this could also have been planned to be a G2 version of Red Alert, or something.

The packaging art gives us a look at his completed color scheme.

And that’s what this Toxitron version is based on, mapping those colors onto yet another retooling of Siege Sideswipe, who’s shown up a lot on this blog over the years, thanks to how often it gets re-used. To run through them all (and link them for reading), I’ve looked at Siege Sideswipe, Red Alert and Covert Clone Sideswipe, Kingdom Sideswipe, and Collaborative Gigawatt, and that’s just the versions I’ve owned. This is why a complete nothing of a character like Sideswipe is still a regular presence in Transformers: His figures tend to be really good, and are easy to repaint and retool. So, it’s a shame this new one’s nearly impossible to find.

Real quick, the way Transformers are shipped out to retailers works thusly: A wave of figures within a particular size class will be packaged together in a box, called a “case.” Typically, there’s multiple copies of each figure in the case, but sometimes one or more of them will have fewer copies packed into that box, often literally one per case, making that figure “shortpacked,” and hard to find. It doesn’t seem to be a deliberate choice on HasTak’s part, but a basic physical reality of how many figures can fit in a case. Ideally, you’d want the shortpacked figure to be the one that has the least demand behind it, but it doesn’t always work that way, and recent releases like Legacy Evolution Tarn and Velocitron Cosmos are infamous for existing at the axis of “shortpacked” and “a figure with a lot of demand,” making them impossible to find in stores, and command extreme prices on the aftermarket. That’s what happened with Toxitron Sideswipe, who was also only one per case, and impossible to find. In this case, I got very, very lucky, seeing a single one on shelves at my local Wal-Mart last week, and so I immediately snatched it up on general principle, letting me see if this guy’s worth the effort to get him.

Robot Mode

The Splatoon decals just kinda manifest around him.

This version of Sideswipe is based on the “Earth Mode” version of the tooling that debuted in Kingdom, but for some reason, actually has Red Alert’s head instead of Sideswipe’s (blocky diagonal horns, versus Sideswipe’s thinner ones that point up.) They did so for variety, maybe? For easy repurposing into a new character? Either way, they’re both just abstractions of the original toy head, so it still works, and is kind of hard to even notice at a glance.

Sometimes, you want to take a break from the Forever War.

Sideswipe’s appeal has always been that his design is very Default Carformer, with the hood chest, wheels on the shins, all of that, and that basic charm’s still preserved here. Truthfully, I’ve always found this sculpt a bit stumpy-looking, but it’s still a good one. I think it’s the backpack, made up of his car roof, and folded-up wheels, which expands his silhouette in a way that makes him read as wider. This design is a very effective downscaling of Masterpiece Sideswipe, but that larger figure had the budget and partscount to do some backpack-compressing shenanigans. Still, that’s not much of a complaint.

If this is his least flattering angle, he’s sitting pretty.

Of course, like the rest of the Toxitron imprint, it’s really all about the colors, and there’s a ton of them here. He’s a very bright, lemony yellow, a similarly bright light blue that’s partially paint, and partially plastic, and he’s got some light gray on his limbs. For paint, there’s a bit of darker blue on his waist and wheels, silver on his feet, and a red G2 Autobrand on his shoulder. And, of course, the best bit of deco, a tampograph on his chest depicting a sunset, with an orange sky and purple clouds.

What people think G2 was, versus what it actually was.

The whole thing’s unbelievably charming and retro, and feels more 80s than 90s, to me (it’s the Vapowave/Synthwave/Retro Wave vibe of the Sunset).

It also goes very well with Toxitron Mirage.

One unusual choice on this guy was leaving his head almost entirely unpainted blue, with just some whites in his eyes.

He doesn’t need to yell, he’s already blue in the face.

It’s imitating the tech specs art, and physical sample of the unreleased figure, which both just rendered his head in solid blue, but I’m just looking over at Mirage, who ignored the unpainted head on his unreleased source material, and gave him a silver face. I’m not even sure I’d call this a bad decision, just an unusual one, and it makes the whole deco ride the line between “slavish homage” and “knockoff” in an interesting way.

They’re like a straight man/funny man comedy duo.

“Well, ONE of us is going to have to change, bro!”

After my Kingdom Sideswipe’s knees proved to be a little bit looser than I’d like, I’m pleased to report that this release has them tighter, along with the rest of his limbs feeling similarly solid. The one thing that’s bizarrely still not solid is the fact that his chest panel doesn’t lock down, thanks to a peg beneath his gut still not fitting into his abdomen. His chest stays in position just fine on friction, but you’d think this would be fixed by now.

Stepping out of the ink.

Posing Sideswipe, meanwhile, instills in me some fond memories of first encountering Siege figures back in 2019, and realizing ankle tilts and wrists that either swiveled, or dipped, were now going to be standard, and this guy’s jointage is still as impressive today as it was back then.

Dynamism!

The one odd point about the tooling has always been that his waist joint is located lower than it is on a human, thanks to his backpack kibble blocking the area where it would normally be, but it’s just a bit of visual oddness.

Most of his visual oddness is in his colors.

So, Sideswipe got an odd combo of accessories. First, he has the same newly-sculpted laser rifle as Kingdom Sideswipe, cast in dark blue, complete with a hole at the back of it that looks like it ought to be 5-millimeter compatible, but strangely isn’t. He also has the same shoulder-launcher that initially came with Siege Sideswipe, complete with a bespoke peg to keep it on either shoulder, and a 5-mm peg for his hands, or anywhere else there’s a port. But the missile that comes with it, though still cone-shaped, is seemingly a new sculpt, with a different kind of peg at the back, one that’s long, skinny, and tapered.

“What am I supposed to do with this?”

The problem is that this new peg also isn’t 5-millimeter compatible, meaning the (non-firing) missile can rest in the (non-firing) launcher, and can’t do anything else. The Kingdom missile had a peg on the end, so he could hold it in his hands like a club, or mount it somewhere on him, and the original Siege missile had an entire second peg on the side, letting it see use as a pistol, if you wanted. It’s not a figure-killer, it’s just oddly baffling that they keep slowly tooling functionality out of him.

An odd visual timeline of them removing features.

Still, there’s a lot you can do with these three accessories (even if it could have been more).

He Pews Good.

He also Imaginary Launches A Missile good, if you’ve got one of Rodimus Prime’s effect parts.

There’s a lot more you can do with the 9 weapons ports across his body, too.

Trying to fit in with the gun-heavy style of the era.

Transformation

As befits a Standard Carformer, this is a straightforward, but satisfying transformation: Flip up the chest, fold the doors out and the arms in, twist the waist and fold the legs in at the knees, and the rest is all details. That being said, I think this mold’s been run a few too many times, because I’m starting to run into some quality control issues on this guy. The door on his left side feels like it has too much plastic in it, and needs to push and snap against its swivel to change positions.

Moving the door on the viewer’s right all the way out, like the other one, is tricky on this version.

Meanwhile, no matter how I finagle it, the back part of the car’s roof (the part formed from his folded-over legs) doesn’t want to sit as flush as on previous copies of the figure.

Basically, those blue bits where the seam is shouldn’t be visible.

It’s not a figure-killer, everything still works, but these long-in-the-tooth-tooling issues are always a drag.

Car Mode

This is a car made for cruising by the ocean at sunset, while listening to “Resonance” by Home.

Usually, it doesn’t matter to me that modern Generations figures can’t actually turn into the real-world vehicles the G1 originals did, due to licensing, but this is one exception, where I do wish he turned into his original Lambo Countach car mode. That’s because it’s a quintessential 80’s car, and it would look killer in these colors. At least the hood is pretty close to the original car’s shape.

80s and 90s.

Still, there’s that coolness of the fact that the car was made to match Earthrise Sunstreaker’s alternate mode, oddly complicated doors and all.

“That’s not what I meant by change.”

Speaking of the colors, they’re the star here, again.This is just a nice color scheme. He looks like he should be cruising a beach at sunset, while chilled-out electronica plays.

Teaching his edgier counterpart how to mellow out.

Sideswipe’s a lot more yellow this time around, with windows that are clear purple. The sunset tampo on the front is now complimented by similar tampos on his doors, and around back, he’s got this neat gradient, where the car changes from yellow to blue. It’s applied a bit unevenly on my copy (and others, enough that it’s probably universal), but it’s close enough.

Who’s got time to worry about an uneven paint job?

While he’s missing color on his headlights and taillights, they did find the budget to paint his front bumper blue, and his wheel rims silver. While the bits of blue in front of his doors are definitely a result of unpaintable plastic, the color contrast looks good. What looks less good is the small amount of paint chipping on his roof, which I guess I’ll have to fix with a Gundam Marker and a toothpick, if I notice it often enough to bug me.

“Wanna take a ride?”

For features, he rolls well, and while his accessories have no dedicated storage, you can use the 5-millimeter ports on his doors and roof to mount his weapons, or other accessories.

Not every ride can be a chill one.

Sometimes, they are extremely not chill.

I sure wish his missile could go anywhere but his launcher, though.

He fits right in over at Inkopolis.

Overall

“Here at the Yellow Order, we’re anything but sour!”

I’ll say this much upfront: If you see one of these guys on store shelves, just buy him. You’re probably never going to see him again outside of the aftermarket, and it’s a miracle I did. Beyond that, though, I’d say he’s worth it on his own merits.

The Lemon Patrol.

Unlike Toxitron Mirage, the Sideswipe mold’s always been a good one. It’s a bit plain, but it’s a workhorse of a tooling, and worth getting some copy of, even multiple copies. And this one’s validly fun! It’s good sportscar that changes into a good robot, and it’s even based on the slightly-less-common Earth Mode version. The Quality Control on this one’s a tad iffy, but acceptable, though the ongoing retooling to remove accessory features is odd. Technically, Kingdom Sideswipe and Red Alert are slightly better versions of the Earth Mode tooling on both Quality Control and accessory merits, but neither of them have these lush colors. This release’s deco’s definitely not for everyone, but if you dig it, it’s wonderful in person, and can even pass as a new character, if you’re into repurposing your robots.

He gives the Inklings a much-needed teammate.

So, buy one if you see one, and if you don’t want it, be a good collector and give it to someone that does want it, without a markup. The worst I can say is that I don’t think this is worth that insane aftermarket markup, as a Normal Good Transformer in Crazy Colors.

Another day, another instance of Capocollo deciding to crash the photo shoot.

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